


un hérisson veut tomber

by acetronaut



Category: SKAM (France)
Genre: M/M, lots of introspection and not a lot of action
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-21
Updated: 2019-02-21
Packaged: 2019-11-01 16:54:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17871098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/acetronaut/pseuds/acetronaut
Summary: What goes through Lucas' mind as he walks out of his bio exam; clip from EP.5 S3, titled "Mercredi 10h40 - Phase de latence".





	un hérisson veut tomber

Lucas' heart beats so erratically in his chest that he thinks he just might explode before he can make it through the door of his bio classroom. 

He's never blown off class like that. For anyone, not even Yann in middle school, who had convinced himself that he was the next Tony Hawk and needed Lucas to skip class with him to practice. He'd been tempted, sure, but ultimately Lucas was a coward and his profs were nightmares to a scared kid like him. School was important, right? Whatever. 

But one look, one word from Eliott, and he was gone. The rest of the world didn't disappear so much as stop mattering much at all, serving no purpose but to be obstacles between him and Eliott. That one cell biology exam didn't matter anywhere as much as how Eliott's smile through the window at him right then did. Imane's questions were nothing more than a soundtrack to getting as close to Eliott as he could, _right now_. And no matter how much he would have hated it normally, Madame Rigaud's raised eyebrows in that moment were nothing more than a passing irritant as he swept out of the room. 

He's never felt so drawn to anyone. Maybe he's imagined it before, wished half-sincerely that he could really have it, but he's never had something so real. He's never felt anything so big or compelling. He's a little afraid that he's somehow turned into Basile, obsessed with sex and actually having it (although sometimes he knows that's not who Basile really is), but then Eliott looks at him and curls the corner of his mouth or gets _that look_ in his eyes and he knows it's not a (just) libido thing. 

(Libido is definitely part of it.  _Damn_ , but he can't help it that Eliott's so fucking hot.)

It's that look Eliott gets whenever they face each other. He can feel Eliott trying to get to know everything about him just by looking (searching, scrutinising every inch of him) but that's not enough, is it? It's feeling like they'll have to touch, eventually, like they'll have to get close to get to know each other the way they both want to; just not quite yet. The Eliott in his head (and when did that happen?) would say that it would be a missed chance to not explore everything else before they get to the conclusion. But Lucas just thinks they've ended up, somehow, in unlucky universe number 9999, where they'll have to wait the longest out of any other Eliotts and Lucases to get to the end. He'll wait, though, for however long it takes; because what else would he do when that is exactly what he wants? 

So it's Eliott's eyes, crinkling and squinting when he smiles, twinkling at Lucas when it should be pitch-black darkness all around them, and how they look like they hold everything worth knowing in the universe, if only Lucas could get close enough for long enough to drown in them. It's Eliott's ridiculous, stupid hair, always looking windswept and a step away from untamed bedhead, yet still begging for fingers to run through and mess it up even further.  It's the way he teases Lucas, smiling like he knows something no one else does, like he has a priceless secret to tell if only someone would ask. It's the way he gets so so close to Lucas, begging him to ask but never telling, never touching. It's the way they orbit each other, ever closer and ever faster but still never colliding, even when they're alone, even when there's no one else to watch. 

And Lucas wants to fall into Eliott so very badly. Wants to be the one with Eliott's arm around his shoulder, wants to share a whole secret world with Eliott that no one else can see into, wants to sleep curled next to Eliott and wants to always be the only one allowed to. Doesn't want this distance that always seems to find its way between them, doesn't know how to stop it from appearing over and over again. Wishes he knew how to say what he felt to Eliott and tell him how overwhelming everything in his life is right now, but how much he knows for sure that he wants to spend every single day with him no matter what else happens. It burns so hard in his chest that he thinks the anyone in the world could read all his thoughts, if only anyone else looked so closely as Eliott did. 

Or as close as Eliott _was_ looking, right now. Lucas wants to smile as hard as Eliott is smiling, in that moment, but he's a hedgehog, still, so he doesn't. Not yet.

**Author's Note:**

> sorry, yeah, i know the title is Pretentious. i'm not even french. or fluent. it means "a hedgehog wants to fall". 
> 
> any expressions of appreciation are treasured, if you feel inclined to leave them in the form of kudos or comments!  
> alternatively, feel free to yell at me about these two assholes and/or find me on [tumblr](https://acetronaught.tumblr.com).


End file.
